Sep 03

Phone (Scott Adams)

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Scott Adams wants to rename the phone. Although I agree with his reasoning below, I can’t get behind the new name he picked. There’s gotta be a better name for it out there than “head”.

I’m biased against the voice communication function of my so-called phone because I hate that particular feature. It’s impossible to have a conversation by cellphone if any of the following conditions is true:

  1. An earpiece, headset, or speakerphone is used.
  2. One of you is in an area with bad reception.
  3. One of you has an iPhone.
  4. One of you has a heavy accent.
  5. One of you is insanely boring.
  6. One of you is near anything loud, such as traffic.

That covers just about every call I’m likely to get. I end half of my phone conversations by shouting “I…CAN’T…HEAR…YOU…SEND…ME…AN…EMAIL!!!”

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